Things are a little unsteady out here on the west coast, what with Mount St. Helens getting ready to pop her top and the swarm of quakes here in California.

So maybe that guy was only off by a month or so? I’m just saying…

I’ve always wanted ocean front property.

Are we all set for the big debate tonight? To keep ourselves awake entertained, the missus and I are going to be playing Bush Bingo.

I think I’ll be adding a drinking element to my game, which should give the missus a nice edge up on me…

9 years ago it was a beautiful sunny San Francisco morning. The biggest morning of my life… And I was FREAKING OUT!

We’d spent months planning and preparing. Every detail had been worked out. After being together for 4 years, this was going to be our dream wedding.

And it was.

I look back on that day as the happiest moment of my entire life. As I was walked down the aisle by my mother and stood at the alter watching this beautiful woman being walked down by her father, all of us surrounded by so many friends and family. So much love. I had stars in my eyes. It was a perfect moment.

So here’s my TGIMTW (Thank God I Married That Woman), our first dance…

Where or When

The Missus: “You’re stepping on my toes…”
Me: “I know, just smile and pretend I’m not…”

Here’s a site called American Accent Training where one can learn the subtle nuances of pronunciation etc.

But wait! You HAVE to listen to the animated guy doing the “True Americana” audio bit on colloquial American expressions… Could they have found someone just a skosh GAYER for that? What a rapscallion!

Allow me translate for you…

Our hero, Mr. Fancy Pants, is looking for a screwdriver to fix his new Hollywood Regency lamp but his idiot boyfriend did not put it back in its proper place. In a fit of frustration, he calls his trusty lesbian friend (who has all the right tools) for help, but he can’t get ahold of her. Finally she says “As soon as I’m finished changing the oil on my chevy I’ll be right over.”

Normally, our hero would fix it himself but since George Bush is still president and lying to us about the state of the nation, he’s found that he just doesn’t have the motivation to risk a prison sentence for fixing a lamp with the wrong tool. Damn Republicans.

While he waits for �ber dyke to show up, he continues to search in vain for the screwdriver…

Aw, c’mon, listen to it - you know it’s true!

via the morning news

I was surfing around looking for a case for my iPod and lord! the things iFound. There are so many options it’s overwhelming. In addtion to the plethora of skins, condoms and faceplates, here are a few fun and funky links to the wild and the wierd…

If you want a mini - check out the CrystalMini custom mini iPod.

If that’s not enough bling for ya, how about P. Diddy’s custom HP iPod.

In the Dang - that’s cool column, there’s the LiliPod all weather case. Then there’s iPod Armor, the Hummer H2 of iPod cases.

If you’re more of an arts and crafts person, there’s always the option of creating your own iPod Cozy. Please - don’t make me one for Christmas.

Somewhat related: the Holy Grail of Apple is up for auction over at eBay.

Completely unrelated and totally random links:
The Arcata Eye Police Log. Now that is some funny stuff right there!

Mmm. Kitty Litter Cake. While clicking around there I also discovered some great halloween recipes.

Worlds Largest Beer Bottle Collection for sale over at eBay. Good thing they don’t have a lot of earthquakes in Germany.

Fun and Games
Frozen Frenzy: deliver 100 cones in 2 minutes.

I’m bored, wanna go out back a shoot stuff?

Squares.

Pegz

Cool video: Behind by Lacquer. Nice car…

Nope. Didn’t feel it.

for Cynthia Nixon? Inquiring minds want to know…

via the missus

Or what we did on our summer vacation (winter and spring too..)

Some before and after pics of the H.A.T.S. project.

cross-posted at the houselog

… on the way to Lowes (again) this morning.

While waiting at a stoplight this pimped out, low-riding, bling-blinged, green apple Suburban pulls up next to me, windows down, playing some hippity-hop rap-crap at 10,000 decibels.

Pissed me right off. So what did I do?

I rolled all my windows down, turned up the bass, cranked my 6 speaker 400 watts and went OLD SCHOOL on her 20 year old big white posseur ass.

I Wish

When she looked over at me I just smiled and gave her that “rollin’ with my homies” thing (I’ve seen the kids do that). She just sat there staring at me slack jawwed. Cracked me the hell up!

5 lights worth of stereo wars later, she finally turned off. Aw - and I was just starting to have fun!

Muuhahahaha! I LOVE being old!

Les aventures d’Oriel which is foreign for “Some game about the history of Quebec” thankfully the instructions are in English (which is English for “American” - no, I don’t know where I am going with this but it sounded kind of funny…) and I suggest reading them first. I’m still stuck on the second level. Ahh, splat.

MOTAS another Crimson Room/Blue Chamber type deal-io. Good way to waste a few hours.

Armchair Games like “Ad-Break Toilet Dash” and “Pizza Delivery Chuck-and-Catch” (which is harder than it looks!) viral games for Wega.

Oooh, Pretty:
Grappa Spirograph doodle.

Escher Blowout 2 Another Photoshop contest from Worth1000. Some of these are flat out amazing.

Friday Night WDK and RP came over to help us put the final queer eye touches on the staging on the house in preparation for the open houses. The place looked stunning! After a couple of drinks and patting ourselves on the back for a long 9 months of hard work, we headed out to dinner at ZIN, which seems to be the new “it” spot in town. The food was amazing. I had the pork chop with garlic mashed potatoes and beet infused cabbage (yum!) and a few Stella Artois. It was nice to catch up with the boys after a long summer incommunicado.

Saturday and Sunday it was time to let the girl fly. The open house started at 11:00 and by 11:01 there were 5 cars out front. I was blown away by the turn out (both days) all day long. There was a constant flow of people. How do I know this? While I was not over at the property, I did pull a total Gladys Kravitz from our house. We joked that I should have something like this to be able to let the agent showing the house know who we did/did not want as neighbors.

We had a number of folks linger, and I mean linger, they were there for 40 mins easily. A few friends swung through to kick the tires. All in all we had incredibly positive feedback and response to the house. There was only one negative thing we heard…

We need to put in a peephole. What’s even funnier is that I have one ready to install, I just hadn’t gotten to it yet. Guess that’s what I’ll be doing today.

And so now we wait. Fingers, toes and anything else ya got - keep ‘em crossed!